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we're okay!

by DeFord

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about

Can't face a little bit of heartache.

- You never told us you were that miserable.
- I couldn't bring myself to admit it.
- We hope you know we would've done anything for you if you would've just... said something.
- I know.. I'm sorry.
- No, we're sorry. We ruined you.
- You don't have anything to be sorry for. You didn't know any better.
- But that's no excuse. It doesn't mean you're alright.
- Well the worst is behind me now, I'm healing. I'm okay. We're okay.

Heretic: Outtake 2

lyrics

I can’t believe I used to wish I’d die
before I hit my twenties, I’m ashamed
‘cus if you hate your life,
just wait six years and everything might change
Doesn’t that sound worth the pain?
And I used to never wipe my eyes
I lived to feel the tears roll down my face
‘Cus if there’s proof I cried
I’m broken but at least I’m not a fake
I’m not guilty, I’m insane

But you weren’t that far off assuming
I don’t understand what I’m doing
And all my blessings fall just out of reach
Who did I think I was fooling
Is this fate or a faded illusion
Regardless I can’t say I’m losing sleep

So I’ll keep
Finding solace in my nonsense (I can’t go back home)
And every thought that I can’t bring myself to say (Can’t face a little bit of heartache)
As they introduce me to my conscience (I can’t go back home)
To validate why I keep pushing you away
And though it kills me I still lived
You’ll forget and I’ll forgive
And we’re okay
And we’re okay

I can’t believe I said these things out loud
I’ve only found the courage in my dreams
Used to shut my mouth
I chose to be complacent, I’m a sheep
I’ve got no one left to blame
But I’ve made the most of what I have
I’m grateful I’ve got everything I need
Used to fake my laugh
God knows no one’s as happy as they seem
But I get closer every day

But some days I still can’t approach you
I’m afraid that I’m not supposed to
and all I know is guilt and blind belief
But I won’t hold that against you
When I fail I’ll swear that I meant to
‘Cus now that you’re let down I feel relief

So I’ll keep
Finding solace in my nonsense (I can’t go back home)
And every thought that I can’t bring myself to say (Can’t face a little bit of heartache)
As they introduce me to my conscience (I can’t go back home)
To validate why I keep pushing you away (and still obsessed with how I’ll never be the same)
And though it kills me I still lived
You’ll forget and I’ll forgive
And we’re okay
And we’re okay
And we’re okay

credits

released February 24, 2023

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DeFord Indiana

21 // lyricist, beep-booper

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